One of my excuses
is always finding ways
of excusing itself
out of situations –

Stepped on your toe?
It doesn’t matter,
Excuse No. 1281
automatically kicks in,
“This is Excuse No. 1281,
my sensor, as it applies to
function No.8850 indicates
one of your toes was stepped on
by one GGG -Government Granted Gear,
shoes, heavy-duty, size 11-D –
I’m programmed to say that I’m sorry,
I will be more careful –
please accept coupon for free
pain clinic treatment,
we pay the first treatment.
After that we promptly
throw you under the bus.

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